> 1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's table was Sir Cumference. He
> acquired his size from too much pi.
>
> 2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island but it turned
> out to
> be an optical Aleutian.
>
> 3. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
>
> 4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because
> it was a
> weapon of math disruption.
>
> 5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be
> stationery.
>
> 6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for
> littering.
>
> 7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum
> Blownapart.
>
> 8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
>
> 9. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a peach.
>
> 10. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
>
> 11. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said
> to the
> other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'
>
> 12. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
>
> 13. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the
> Grass.'
>
> 14. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
>
> 15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small
> medium at
> large.
>
> 16. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a
> seasoned
> veteran.
>
> 17. A backward poet writes inverse.
>
> 18. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In Feudalism it's your
> Count
> that votes.
>
> 19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
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